Due to a fiercest reluctance

There are plenty of things to be done sooner in my list. I must do this, then I should do that, Oh no, I have to do my prior assignments, oh please, I've not fulfill yet my room's payment, bla bla bla.. These things are straying on my mind. Frankly, I still couldn't devise what is the most important thing to do first. All my life doesn't go as well as I want. I wish I could find the way out from this circumstance. I try to endure my burden of proof  properly. It just because people around me recognize me as a mobility student, they think that I must be the best one. Perhaps, they are hoping whether I can impress them very well. In fact, I have been trying to offer my best in here. At least, I tried.

Beeing an eloquent person in few particular expertises is not easy to pin down. At present, I still don't now how to become that kind of person. My skill in academic is above standard but not superior. Although I can play several instruments, I am blind in block notes. I am also fierce in time management (for me arranging schedule is very hard to be defeated and to be punctual is the hardest one) . I bet if I stay comfortably in this way, I never be advanced in reaching more better quality of life.

Time is always ticking then i realize how much time that I spent for doing nothing in my life. I must encourage myself. What I have to do is should not pile my tasks into the montain's framework and just sit and wait whenever an angel comes to wield her magic wand and wish my tasks has been done very well by one swing. I mustn't rest on in the safe point. I must keep running into my goals. Making my beloved peoples be proud of having me in their life. Last and not the least, releasing the fiercest reluctances is the most significant thing to do first to pop up new spirit of fighting. SEMANGAT!!

In Memoriam : Arya Winzan

I am sitting in front of my laptop right now and still wondering how God determines our life.  Yesterday, when I was going to Kuala Lumpur and doing something fun with my Indonesian friends there, I got a bad new from one of my members, Upi. The bad news announced that Upi's friend named Arya passed away. Upi thought that he was her senior and at that time I never devised the man who passed away is the man whom I recognize well. After reading a message from Upi's friend, I really shocked and lost my words. Her friend told that Arya Winza has passed away. "Hold on..I have heard this name before!" I thought. I frightened to think that Arya was my friend, not the another Arya. I was curious and I wanted to make a sure for this. I begged Upi to give my friend's number, Erick. Then I sent message and asked him for the rightness. Unbelievable, the truth told he was Arya who's my friend. Arya who loves playing guitar, Arya who's enjoying to play the games online, Arya who's easily ashamed, Arya who's a kind guy and at the time, everything about Arya rotated on my mind. I felt a sad atmosphere that covered me at night.

After I arrived in my room, then I checked Arya's facebook. I found a lot of friends wrote plenty of farewell words to his wall. I was silent and read them carefully. Suddenly, I awaked and realized that I can not meet him again till my turn comes. I love Germany and so he does. We were hardly supporting Germany when Germany competed with others in World Cup 2010. I never imagined before that it was his last chance to watch the world cup. He won't be able to see and support Germany sturdily at the next world cup in 2014. This life is short and so our meeting is. Undetected heart disease has attacked him. 

People came and went as they want and just the only God who determines the way. I am writing this blog to memorize Arya Winzan as a good friend of mine. To memorize everything about him that's best to be remembered. This young man's life reminds us to do a lot of goodness in our short life. We never know when God will take away our chance or even our lovely people to live and for breathing. Do the best things to every single person around you and make them happy. Believe in your God and surrender all your whole life into His embrace. By God's kindness and supervision, we absolutely can push away our worries and let the frightfulness go. I believe Arya Winzan is really happy now in meeting with our Father in the heaven. I was dropping my tears while imagined he's smiling and sitting beside God now.  I believe you are happy right now and Jesus takes care of you as well as you never dream of. Heaven is very wonderful and amazing place. Isn't it?:)

Good bye, my friend. Send my best regards to all of heaven's spirits. We're gonna miss you in here:') Thanks Lord for the chance that You've given to me by knowing everything about Arya and to be his friend along his life.

Rest in Peace, Arya. A well-known person is remembered by people after his death.

I found two dumbheads' pictures which make me became dumbfounded!

In this afternoon when I was alone in my room and didn't know what to do, I looked around my sister's notes in the facebook. OWH MY GOSSSHHHHH!!! What I found has been shocking me! Then I started to laugh after seeing them. Those are my full sister's and brother's pictures. They look like two silly persons with those faces!

It takes more than a month I have not been seeing my-not-easily-controlled-brother and my-well-done-sister. We had been together in last month and did a craziest thing (again). We turned on some disco musics in living room and began to dancing Aloha Hawaii, Uncontrolled Bollywood's dance, Rapper dance, African dance, and other completely shattered dances. It was horrible but it's really really fun to do. Suddenly we couldn't remember that we were not kids any more. Unfortunately, we had no time to record the moment. I miss the moment when we shared our stupidity and togetherness.Ohh no... I wanna dancing with my full sist and bro as soon as possible! Can not wait until the time^^..

By the way, here are their pictures.

My older sister-Kak Jojo

my little brother-Godvin

These pictures remind me to an animal named Tarsius (I don't know exactly how its spelling). Tarsius has a pair of beautiful eyes. This is the Tarsius' picture.

He is cute, Isn't he?

It seems Kak Jojo, Godvin, and Tarsius very seriously compete to win the 1st rank of The Most Beautiful Eyes Competition over the world. Ehehehehehe....After you look these pictures, what do you thing about them? Yes, they are unique, guys! Huuuahahahaha..Can you see my lil brother's face? Look at his nostrils. I think they can hold four huge thumbs to pick out the nasal mucus. WOW!!God also creates him with a pair of charming-perfect-sexy-lips. As a phrase says "Like younger brother, like older sister". My older sister did not want to yield to our brother and was really excited to exhibit her alien face. What kinds of these idiot's faces they are showing to us. I will keep these pictures carefully then later I'll tell their kids what a silly thing which their mommy or daddy had done in the past! Yeaaahhh! ^^. For this time, I thing I am still NORMAL. At least until they eventually found my picture with an alien face, too!

Although I am always at loggerheads with my siblings, I do really miss them. I miss their foolishness, ignorance, and everything about them. At all, they are really my full sister and brother :). Love u all, my comical dumbheads!Take care yourself and please do not do any stupidity without me. ^^

Sorry, I couldn't really understand what you were talking about, Dude!

For a moment, I thought that there's something wrong with my sense of hearing. I tried to listen up my china friend when she was calling me by phone. She talked too fast and her pronunciation in English was difficult to be understood. Her Chinese dialect is so stuck on her. At that time, I was often to say sorry to her in this short conversation.  "Am I too fast for you?" She asked me. "Yeah." I answered her. Finally she made it slower. But guess it guys what happen next! I even did not get any point on this conversation. Hahaha.. But actually my China friend is a very  nice girl. She is my senior in Agrotourism Recreational Park course. I almost forgot that I've asked her to pass me her notes. But guys, just know she did call me for asking me that If I need the notes or not. Amazing, in Malaysia I found many kinds of friends who take care of me very well. I appreciated in what they have done to me. I am so grateful and thankful to have them in here. I have Kak Imas, Kakak pekerja di Kolej, Bu Ina who is an Indonesian lady and  she also teaches in the UPM, my classmates in Landscape Architecture and Agriculture, My Ikatan Kristiani friends (they are Stephanie, Joanne, and others), and also my new sister, Elli. :) I start enjoying my life here. They are really helpful and so nice to me. I never feel this feeling before. Here I met many peoples who encourage me and support me more than my best friends do. I know them for couple of weeks, but they could consider me very well.  I feel better here but I still miss my lovely peoples in Indonesia..>.<...Ow my goshhh..LOVE them so much!^^

The point is I am not a loner and I am not alone. I still need some body else. And guys, God is really very kind to me! He doesn't give me a friend but He gives me more and it is a new family whom I am comfortable with. You rock Lord! (^^)v

Tonight, I spend a night at my classmate's apartment. I call her kak Nik. We are in the same class in the Agrotourism Recreational Park course. She accepted me very well in her house. She offered foods, drinks, and space to me. She is an independent woman and i like her styles. She bought her own car, furniture, home, and hers by her own money. She is a hard worker and  has a good position in a company. She gets full scholarship from her job to continue her study . She has not being married but she is in a relationship.  She's also smart. Today she helped me to do my homework.Hehehe... After finishing my homework, she invited me to swim in a swimming pool inside the building. At that time,it bothered me when Iranian, African, and local guys there watched at us while we are swimming. I minded it. Thanks God, we didn't take a long time for having fun in the pool.  Anyway, this young woman really motivate me by her lifestyle. :). Thanks a lot Kak nik to show me your rules!
Then last and not the least,today my boy, Onni is going back to Bandung. I pray for Onni's safety in his way to go back to Bandung. May God bless you, Dear. I will re post my blog later. Good night, reader!

I am a sister of an Iranian lady

Today is the third week since I have been arrived in Malaysia. There's a lot of experiences that happened in my life. Well, for studying in Universiti Putra Malaysia as an exchange student is never flashed through my mind. In fact, it has been happening in my life. This all is free for me. I do not need to pay all these costs by my self or burden my parents. But, the consequences are I must leave my lovely peoples, I can not find some foods that have suitable taste in my tongue, and it takes 6 months to meet my lovely peoples again. These things are in proportion to what I gain in here. I call my self as a lucky girl. In an event's named New International Welcoming Program, I met a beautiful Iranian Lady.She talked to me first and asked me where did I came from. My answer was Indonesia then she was interested to listen to me. She said that she had visited Padang in Indonesia.

It never overcome from my mind that the short conversation became a lifelong relationship between us. Her name is Elnaz Yaz. I call her Elli. She is the first year student in Department of Architecture in the UPM.  She is a pretty lady, modest, reliable, and sociable person. Even though we had different religion and culture, it doesn't block our connection and relation. I like her personality and I love to help her for finishing her sketches. She is a tolerant person. She can accept other people's differences. But she is also a sensitive person. She is easily to get worried about everything that she had done to people's around her. She is afraid to hurt some body's feeling.

We don't have any blood relation but we are like sisters. If she has free times, she will messages me and asks where I am. We share all of our stories and what happens everyday.One day she gave me two pieces of letters and put them on my table. I read the letters for many times. She wrote:

For my sist,

You don't know how much I love you, you don't know how happy and grateful I am for having you and meeting you and knowing you. If you know, then pick a white rose everyday and leave it beside the window, I will receive your kasih, I will appreciate it and I will keep it right in my heart. There are so many things in this world that we-as humans-don't know, That's only God who arranges and crates and makes changes. I learn it from you that God's want is the best thing for us to follow in our life.

Dear, some times I wonder how miracles happen. They happen really!! Miracles are hard to understand and believe sometimes, but when our earthly wisdom can not work they appear. They are like embrace of God, when you feel something is coming into your way that you never imagined. I want to believe them, I want to understand and feel them in my life.

Well now it's 4:30 am and the only thing I want to do is writing. I am attached to writing, that's the only way I can express my self. I love  you and it's an honor for me to know your religion, your culture, and you-yourself. I truly feel we are like sisters now! We were in the same room for tonight and you gave me your space and you kindly treated me like a real sister, I am so grateful for that and I hope I can do something for you someday too. I read your Bible last night, there was a beautiful sentence which touched my heart. It really did touch my heart. That's why I say to you that miracles happen. When God selects prophets to be His messenger then He inspires them, He inspires His words to mankind's heart and it's really unbelievable when God starts to talk to the humans.

Dear, let's believe that sometimes our mind is limited and can't go up, but we may fly by our soul. This is possible, when we pray, when we bless, when we love or help people or when we do something nice toward God, It's like take off of an air plane when we want to fly.There's a desire for me since long time ago. It's to be able to fly. I want to open my wings toward sky and go up directly, safely, and certainly to the embrace of God.

That's my talk and I wanted to write last night. I am now going dear, take so much care and stay lovely and happy be my sister Forever! Thanks for Everything..

Elli

22 July 2010

Elli, you will always be my sister from now till forever. :) it's nice to be your sister too